Seven Brides for Seven Brothers Review

Feb 7, 2017   //   by admin   //   News  //  No Comments


Seven Brides for Seven Brothers Review

Those fine folks over at Fetch Publicity challenged me to expand my horizons and get outside of my comfort zone in the New Year and for a die hard horror fan there surely is no more terrifying genre than the musical.

But I was intrigued, maybe I was missing out on something. And as my mantra is to try anything once (except incest and morris dancing) I took the plunge.

Fetch obliged by sending me 5 DVDS, a mix of classic and modern musicals.

So armed with a bowl of popcorn and a poorly seven year old, we set off on this musical adventure…

Cue music:




In 1850 Oregon, when a backwoodsman brings a wife home to his farm, his six brothers decide that they want to get married too. (Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer).


I decided to start my journey into the musical genre chronologically which led me to start with Seven Brides for Seven Brothers, but to be honest it probably was the best of the bunch to gently ease a horror fan into. The synopsis above hints at what could have quite easily turned into a Texas Chainsaw Massacre prequel, as leather-clad backwoodsman Adam strolls into town looking to buy a bride while singing a catch little ditty called “Bless your Beautiful Hide”…

Images of Adam skinning his bride leap unbidden into my head. Bizarrely he manages to find a woman, Milly, interested in taking him up on the offer to live in the middle of nowhere and look after him and his 6 brothers.

seven-brides-for-seven-brothersOf course the introduction of a woman into this masculine mix leads the rest of the brothers into yearning for their own female companionship and faster than you can say Wrong Turn, they’re trekking into town to kidnap six brides of their own. Literally, kidnap them against their wills.

At this point I tried to explain the gender politics of nineteenth century frontier towns, seen through the filter of 50’s Hollywood, to my poorly seven-year old daughter. Things got complicated. But finally convinced her that kidnapping is not an acceptable way to start a relationship no matter your socio-economic status. Parenting Level Unlocked!

Thankfully (?) for the audience the unwilling brides all start to suffer from Stockholm Syndrome and they fall in love with the Hills Have Eyes clan. And then before the viewer starts to overthink things the film ends with everyone accepting the new status quo. Its never really explained what happened to the parents of the seven boys, but I think its safe to assume the brothers ate them both one harsh winter.

Now if you read the above and assumed that I didn’t enjoy the film, you’d be dead wrong. I’ve gotta admit I loved it. The plot is ridiculous of course, but the cast manage to keep things entertaining. The seven brothers, all with dyed ginger hair, manage to bring real identity to their roles, so that you can distinguish between each of them.

Costume and art design is incredibly well done. The first 30 minutes all the colours are earth tones, but once Milly begins to make her presence felt, the world becomes all dazzling Technicolor primary colours.

The choreography is genuinely breath-taking, there are several stand out dance numbers, in particular the barn-raising sequence is electrifying for its displays of agility. As a genre fan, I enjoyed these in the same way I’d appreciate an intricate Jackie Chan action set piece.

And dammit if the songs aren’t damn catchy…

No one was more surprised than me about how much I enjoyed Seven Brides for Seven Brothers. I’d definitely recommend it as a good entry point to the genre.


Join me next week as Frank Sinatra, Bing Crosby and Louis Armstrong team up for High Society.

You can pick up all the films here:

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